Every people have their own site of glory.. and glory is not only achieved when one's living in a magnificent palace or castle, or have a $$$ as far as 7-8 digits or becoming the most powerful person on earth.. No, glory for me is when you come to a place that fits you like a king and you feel that you are the master of everything in the realm, even if it's just your imagination.. well, that sounds like a myth, but in my case it does exists..
For years since the "glorious revolution" that took away a year ago at my hometown, from that moment it felt like i was being crowned as a duke or whatever with the title of The Biggest Loser of Jengka, or at least that's what i think! and from this all the commotions started...
This epic continues this year, after a long end-semester holiday.. firstly it's hard to believe that I'm started to lose grip on the so-called "crown of thorn".. but as hard as achieving it, its important for me to keep hold on it, as it is THE source of glory to continue my reign for the next 3-4 years and so on.. but the temptation! with 24-7 of kinda variety of foods available in the cafe, it's damn hard to sustained my place in the throne! and the signs of deterioration is escalating everything every time i see it in front of the mirror.. but at that time i just ignored it..
As the throne is slipping through my grip, somehow i still could managed to overcome it, by trying to retain back the full power of my glory.. trying to eat less, or just eat bread, or jogging like almost everyday, everything seems doesn't work for me, or just work for a short while.. for me, losing the privileges to taste different kind of foods is like loosing what is meant in my life! but this so-called privileges doesn't come empty-handed.. because when we want something, we will have to lose something.. and for a long time i still dont realise that part yet, until one tragedy occurs that changes everything..
It happen during shopping with my mother at the store.. since there is no other good place to shop at tangkak, maybe that is one of my favorite place at my hometown.. well, i kinda plan on looking for a new jeans to use in the class, and after looking for a while, i found the almost-perfect jeans for me.. the texture.. the design.. kinda nice in it's own standards, one that doesn't involve ROMP i mean..
But there is one problem - the jeans are only available in size 31! suddenly i realize that with my rate of expansion, there is no way that the jeans will fit on my thighs! but for some reason, i'm still thinking that i still have the "thing" to make this jeans fit on me.. and that proves to be a bad idea! as i'm trying my best to wear it, suddenly the vision of Tori trying to suck-it-in the disguise "Tiffany Wilson" and when Lisa showing her "talking tummy" to Brit in White Chicks came out! OMG now i realise how pathetic my situations are!
It's hard to imagine, but at that moment i realised that the glory of being fit for any type of clothes beyond my standards has evaporates completely! and I've been officially stripped from my 32-inch list!! it feels like that i'm not belong at there or anywhere anymore.. and my reign on the fabulous clothes and jeans is all over!! God that's so miserable.. and depressed!
So i just left there with my last fragments of dignity, leaving my territory for a while for others that are more suitable for the throne.. but don't think this is the end, because one day i will come back to claimed the throne that i've lost.. and the duel is still not over yet!