So i just bring the unfinished work to class and planning to continue there.. And i tried my best to prepare early to my biology lab class, and thank god i did come on time.. Unfortunately, i forgot to bring my lab coat.. so i had to run and rush back to my room to take it.. It's so ironic to think that i started the first day and the first class after Eid with a jog and sweat.. huhu..
At the lab, thank God there is plenty time to do my reports and Alhamdulillah i managed to finished it.. Unfortunately, Ipin did not photocopy the lab-report covers yet, so i have to wait until the end of the class to submit it..
After class, khalid and i went to have lunch at the cafetaria. Finally, after we are about to finish our lunch, Ipin came and gave us the lab-report covers that he'd just photocopied.. Looking that the time which is just 11.30am, we thought we have a plenty of time and decided to go to the library to complete the cover form. At there, we met Eddy Fernandez studying.. Unfortunately, i am so excited about the movie preview for the weekend that he showed us, without noticing that time had passes very fast around us.. But i barely finished the report cover on time - at 11.55pm.. and it must be submitted before noon sharp!
And i ran into the lecturer's block and dashes to the lecturers room.. but as i suspected, unfortunately she's not in her room anymore, and the room's locked! I felt so depressed at that moment and trying to find her, assuming that she is just leaving the room and still around the co rner.. but she was nowhere to be found.
Devastated, i put the reports on her pigeon hole.. hoping that there is still some room for her acceptance. Not to mention mark deduction! huhu.. At that moment, all the cherry blossom and festive moods are all gone.. I felt so depressed at that moment..
Thinking that maybe i could overcome this by getting a short nap, i rushed back to my room, hoping for a little moment of tranquility.. Unfortunately, my roomates are having a 'gotong-royong' at the room! It left me speechless and i dont know what to do, or even to think at that moment.. But i just sat silently at my bed, letting them finished their works.. And at that moment i'm still wondering what trouble that lies ahead after this..
At the evening, i was hoping that all the problems that our chemistry lecturer faced during the Ramadan are already being settled.. I do know that she may have some misunderstanding and awkward situation with us, but i think all of that are just old stories that are tend to be forgotten, especially after Raya.. And i expect that we will have a happy class, just like always.. But unfortunately, she never shows up, with no messaging and whatsoever!
Well, don't know what to think anymore, i went home with one of my colleague.. and he came to a visit at my room and we have a chat about raya and all. And the chat ting went on and on about family etc.. At that moment, i feel that i can divert my thoughts about all the things that happen today by listening to him chattering.. Unfortunately, that's before he open some of the shocking revelations that i could not imagine that it actually came from his mouth! It gave a freaking hell out of me!! About the thing that we talked, just say that i makes me feel do not want to become or involved in this "gaia" thing anymore.. huhu..
After that, i felt like all around me is just collapsing.. Suddenly it make me think on myself - what am i becoming? what choices does i must follow? do i really want to end becoming the thing that i was becoming right now?? OMG the pressure is soo escalating! I don't know what to do, and i've lost my mood to study too last night.. Feeling like i need an escape route, i went down with my friend to for dinner.. But to be honest, my escape getaway doesn't work!
Guess what happen next? More unfortunate things of course! It's just when I'm in front of the door of my room that i finally realised that i does not bring the key! With all of m y roomates are out at Jengka, all is becoming one hell of a night to me.. I think at myself, what is the possibility that i could get so many unfortunate events in just one day like this?? I wonder why God gave me such a burden today, on the first day of study?? What's wrongdoings that i have done to make me deserve this??
But when i'm thinking deeper, remembering what that I've done during the past weeks of raya, i think in some way, God is paying cash to me, and i guess i deserves this..
And i wondering off around the hostel.. feeling lonely without purpose.. i tried to find some sense of calm on my friends room, but it just adding up my miserable.. so i went out, walking alone without any way to go.. and that is when i saw it... the only place that is always open to all who visiting it.. the only place that ones can seek refuge, seeking redemption and searching for the true peace.. physically and emotionally.. the only place where i can see the lights despite the darkness that surrounded me - The House of God..
Suddenly my heart felt that there is a glimpse of hope there.. an answer that i was looking for was only metres away in front of me.. And i went there for His compassionate... in His house.. Uwais al-Qarni.. At there i perform the last daily prayers there..
Suddenly something happen.. Like an angels touch, someone touch my shoulders, and i knew that i have to become an imam for someone that have just arrived.. So i just continue my prayer.. Suddenly i felt that there is a responsible upon my shoulders.. i continue my prayers, with my heart continuously pray to Allah, may He accept my ibadah and all the makmum behind me.. And Alhamdulillah, it ends well..
After that night, i always wonder to myself, is this the path of redemption that God tried to show me? He had showed me His straight path when i felt completely lost.. And now it is now on me to make the final decision.. It's still rest upon my hand to choose.. And i talk to myself, i will try my best to change the bad side of me.. even it takes time and sacrifices, i will try my best to follow His path.. InsyaAllah..
There is always a light at the end of the tunnel.. For all the unfortunate events that i have endured, who knows that hikmah is waiting at the end of it?
God always has His own way of showing His true path towards the one He chooses..
In the end, i realised that yesterday is not so all unfortunate indeed..