Saturday, 30 May 2009

Lalalala.. hari2 kerja...

dah lama aku xkeje..
slalunye kalu cuti2 sem camnih, aku dok mlepak kt umah je.. lyan tv.. komputer..
buang mase je 24 jam..
memg bosan gile.. rase cam hidup nih x bermakna..

tp alhamdulillah..
cti sem ni, dgn izin Allah, aku dpt bkeje d sbuah kdai bku..
mule2 cam biase la.. kekok sgt..
maklumla bkn jenis peramah..

berbekalkan rm2 sejam, aku bkeje dr pkul 8pg smpai 6ptg..
mcm2 keje aku buat, memg aku kne take care 1 kdailah ksimpulannye..

mule2 memg rase pnat, dan jgk risau..
tkot aku xdpt nk adapt dgn keje ni..
tgk pkeje2 yg ade, diorg mcm2 dah tau..
drpd kira brg, susun stok, uruskn mesin ftostat, fax dll..
pendek kte xde ape yg diorg xtau buat kt kdai ni..
aku lak, cam tkejar2 nk kne wat sume bnde..

plg aku tensen, bile nak wat ftostat,
ftostat ic la.. set la.. dpn blakang la..
mcm2 function yg kne ingat, pning pale otak aku..
ftostatnya bukan sikit lak 2, kdg2 sampai beribu2..
plg tensen bile dh stat ftostat, p2 silap..
rugi siot ketas.. huhu

mggu ptama memg pnuh dugaan..
pas2 aku dpt jd cashier, nih ok la..
at least sume brg ade hrga..
xpyh aku nk ingat sgt..

tp kalu time cari brg utk org, aku rinse gak..
aku bkn tau pon ktne puncher, laminating film, dn byk lg..
p2 pnye le byk menatang2 pelik yg aku kne knal..
huhu.. tensen gile..

tp nsib bek la rkan2 skeje aku sumenye spoting2 blaka..
drpd kak kamariah yg laha 2, smpai le kpd kak ana yg lbh junior dr aku,
sumenye kuat laha n klakar gile..
hepi aku dok cnih.. hehe

n yg plg best, bos aku 2la..
laha tp spoting..
xpnh marah, tp ske main psiko dgn aku..
huhu.. kdg2 tgugat gak mental aku ni bile kne laha dgn die..
tp laha2 cam2 jela.. xde la smpai maki2 @ mrh..
wat aku bsyukur dpt keje kt cnih..

hari ni bos aku g holiday ke trg..
so secara lahiriahnye, kitorg mdeka la..
boleh wat ape saje sbb bos xde..
mklumla akak2 yg len 2pun sumenye skepala..
so keje smpai mlm pon xksh.. hehe

yg plg aku ske keje kt cnih..
intenet die laju nk mampos..
dh la komputer grand..
kak imah ckp, asalkn xde bos, gasak je..
best siot.. hehe
aku nk online smpai mlm..

Wednesday, 6 May 2009

Balik Kampung

The moment i've been waiting for..
the moment where all the burden and pressure i hold throughout the semester have been lifted..
the moment of FREEDOM..
Exam is over!! and tomorrow i'll be getting home..

nevertheless, going back to kampung doesn't mean that it will be all over..
balik kampung doesnt mean the end of my responsibility..
and balik kampung definitely doesn't mean freedom to do anything..

in reality, more awaits me there than here..
more responsibility.. more daily things to do..
and overall, less freedom..

but like the old folks says,

"hujan emas di negeri org, hujan batu di negeri sendiri;
tapi lebih baik di negeri sendiri.."

(rain of gold in falls other land, while rain of rocks fallen onto our land, but still our land is the best)

despite the hardships and limitations that i will endure at my hometown..
i still love my home, no matter what..
because that's the place where i learn about my life for the past 17 years..
and to just ignoring that for some pleasure that i've recently discovered,
it's not worth it..

and tomorrow i will came back to my roots..
and live a bitter-sweet life.. for about two hours..
with my mother, and all my family around me..
all that i'd treasured most..

To all of my friends out, wish all of you a great holiday!!See ya next sem!!

Over... and Relieved!

At last! the moment that i've been waiting for...
The last "battle of the titans" are finally over...
all the pressure.. hard work and sweat are all finally over...
at last, the day has come...

The end of final examination!!
from here, my path is still unclear..
planning for this upcoming holiday... hmm.. i'm still thinking on it..
whether i will work..
or i will just sitting home wasting my time (or watch all the novels that i've bought before)..
or whatever might has silently waiting for me back home,
only God knows..

I hope for the best for this upcoming holiday..

Sunday, 3 May 2009

A true story about Me + Money

Lately within this two-three days, i always wondering and pondering.. During eating.. During studying.. or when doing nothing on my bed, the same question kept playing on and on in my head,

"how on earth am i going to find enough money to have a safe travelling to home??"

this is my first encounter with this type of problem, since I've started studying here.. by my surprise, i don't expect that i will have a financial problem this semester, despite less money was given by the PTPTN.. and it don't take much longer to see it worsen.

this "economic crisis" that hits me started before the studying week, in which at that time, its like my ATM card have seemed becoming almost worthless..

seeking for alternatives, i reluctantly rushed back home during the week, to ask for "fund injection" from my dad. It's not like he is stingy to me or something, but it was me felling a sort of shame to my father to ask him for money via phone.. it will be better if i came directly upon him, since the money that i would like to ask is not small either..

and the plan turns out successfully! i get enough fund (and also relieved from a fever, thank God!) to spend in KL book festival that comes just after a get back to campus.. its so great!

But out of my sensors, the worst is yet to come!

after the trip, my money in possession has shrunk to just about RM50! (and don't ask about the remainders in bank, its empty!) and my naive thinking at that time is that, "oh don't worry, i still have more money to buy a ticket to go home." and more naive thinking after that is, "ticket only cost about RM20 only, and with addition of travelling expenses for about RM10, i still have RM20 to spend upon on other things," and that is when I'm wrong!

i spend like hell on foods everyday, for a more than a week.. final exams has already begun, and for some reason the tensions of preparing for finals makes my appetite for food becoming larger, and so it on. after eating nasi campur at the cafeteria or dining, i search for something light, like the mouth-watering variety of kuihs that was served at the cafeteria as desert. Oh God! It felt so good at that time!

as a result, money flew off from my pocket like water, and it don't take me long to realise that my RM20 so-called "remainder" has all gone. realising that i do not have money to spend anymore, I've started plan B, that is to cut away all my expenses on food and only depend on dining food to eat every day!

and so it started my operation "diet" plan. as a cover-up to my roommates n friends, i tend to use the word "diet" or "fasting" rather then "i don't have money" to explain why I'm not eating in the cafe. It sounds pathetic, but as long as i can avoid spending unnecessary items, who kares??

and it continues until now, with yesterday is the climax of it.

finally, I've managed to buy a ticket to come home this coming holiday.
and i thought that was all for my financial misery!

on the contrary, yesterday when looking at the calendar to count for "the day of freedom", i just realised that my motorcycle license renewal is on this week, wed 6th!

how on earth am i going to find money to pay for that??? it really troubles me.. i don't know how to react with this shocking problem. at last I've come out with some solution, yet it have a positive n negative effect.

  1. Borrowing from a friend. Effective, yeah. But i have already borrow some money from my friend before, and truthfully i don't want too add the burden of having more debt to pay next semester.

  2. Asking from my dad more money. Dear God! This will finally become my last resort for solution! i don't want him to questioned about how I'm spending the money, and also i cant stand the uttering of him when knowing all the money he gave before has already gone.

  3. Borrowing from mother. Desperate, yes. But not this desperate! This final resort only will be used for code red or critical situations only.

  4. Borrowing from my brother. Am i that stupid?? No thanks!

Finally, I'm taking solution no. 5, that is to surrender to God and His fate. I kept praying to God, asking Him for a way out of this mess.

But the license is still needs to be renewed, so when the date of renewal are almost near, i asked my friend to borrow me a sum of money at this Tue, the day that i planned to renew my license.

And when i go to the Pasar Malam with my friend, i bought almost nothing. Luckily for me, one of my friends asked me to buy two burgers for him, and that saved me from going back to campus empty-handed.

and something happen at the Pasar Malam last night. as i passing through the crowd, it cannot help to see the beggars at the middle of the pedestrian-walk, sitting there waiting helplessly for donation from the passers-by. i makes me kept thinking that the misery and troublesome of my financial crisis is nothing compared to the suffering of them.

I'm only incapable of paying for the renewal of my driving license, and i think that i was the most pathetically poorest person existed on earth; discarding the fact that i should be grateful that i still capable of eating good food everyday, not like the beggars whom seek for a scratch of food from the mercy of others.

and it gives me a feeling of calm deep inside my heart. and i said to myself, "I'm still capable (mampu), hence it was the responsibility of the capable to help the less capable." and i sincerely gave her all the coins that i found abundantly inside my wallet and prayed to God that my earnings (rezeki) will be eased (dipermudahkan).

and God is All-Hear, All-Knows..

During that night, my family called to say hi. After a couple of minutes of chatting, i talked to my mother about my financial problem to renew my license.

As my surprise, my father also heard about the problem, maybe because my mother set a loudspeaker upon the conversation. And he said to my mother (in which i also heard it) that he will transferred a sum of money for me to pay for the license.

the shocking revelations gave me a triumphant outburst, and it felt like all my burdens before have been finally lifted.

i kept thanking God, for allowing such a coincidence happen. I really felt grateful that despite my seldom forgetness upon Him, He never casted me away and always helped me, always in a way that He only knows how.. Wallahualam..

nevertheless, this "dieting program" has now shows its positive effects. My tummy is not like a balloon anymore, and my cravings for food are also gone with it. That's a relief.

Saturday, 2 May 2009

Its hard to satisfy people's desire.. especially when you are BROKE rite now!!

I have a friend..
He asks me to go accompanying him to go Pasar Malam
(Night Market)..
Despite i don't have any money rite now,
I still patheticly accept his request..
And yet, my head is still thinking rite now,
"what on earth am i going to do there when i don't have any money to buy anything??!!"
Most of us will definitely have involved in this kind of situation once or twice in their daily life. A friend, whom is quite close to us, asking us to do something that either we are incapable of or we are not in the mood for it, what are the most intriguing answer that we could come out with?

Mostly for us, the answer would either "no thanks" or "i'm not in the mood", yet some people tend to give more honest answer - "sorry, im broke" which are more patheticly considerable, yet it also gave a sense of hope that our partner will gave his/her final rewarding declaration that all the expenses are on his/her treats.

It seemed to be easy to handle such cases, but what about reagarding in situation in which we have already making the promise in the first place, before realizing that our pocket has already empty? Or in situations in which our friend is so insisting, and yet we finally surrendered to his/her compelling pressure?

Obviously, it will be meaningless plus a waste of time if you go to Pasar Malam without any money to spend on. But a promise is still a promise, and it is our duty to accomplish it.

So the problem is now, how am i going to find some money so that i do not look penniless and desperate at the Pasar Malam?? May i remind that it is like less than 5-6 more hours to countdown!!

Nevertheless, the only effective option that i have rite now, that i might do if there is no other option for this evening's hang out, is borrowing from other people!!!

Humiliating, yes. But not as humiliated as watching our friends eating his food while desperately looking for something that was more distracting from that!

Moral of the story:
Be aware on your pockets when deciding on someone's invitation for a hang out, because your financial life might hang in balance with it!